Grief reactions are normal responses to the loss of a beloved pet. Although reactions express themselves physically, spiritually and emotionally; what we usually notice the most are the emotional reactions. Often, we may find ourselves feeling love, anger, sadness, and regret all at the same time. And these emotions can become even “louder” through the holidays, especially during the first holiday without your pet.
One of the tools to identify our emotions, and to begin the healing journey, is to write about them. To initiate this process, we offer the following sentence starters. You may find you have experienced all of these and they trigger your writing. Or, only a few describe your reactions. Choose the ones that speak to you or resonate with you today. Please be aware many emotions may come up...consider having a friend to speak to afterward who understands the grief of losing a pet.
This holiday season…
Sadness:
I wanted…
I feel sad when…
I miss…
Anger:
I don’t understand…
I am angry that…
I feel frustrated with…
Fear:
I am afraid…
I am worried about….
I feel scared because…
Regret:
I didn’t want…
I regret…
I wish….
Comfort:
I need…
I want…
I have…
Love:
I love…
I appreciate…
I know…
I remember…
You may have had traditions with your pet that defined how you celebrated this time of year. After the death of your pet, the holiday season will not feel or look the same. Traditions and rituals may bring a tear or sadness rather than joy or peace. Reflect on what you need and/or want for this holiday season.
This holiday season, what I want and need are…
Tips for the Holiday Season:
One of the tools to identify our emotions, and to begin the healing journey, is to write about them. To initiate this process, we offer the following sentence starters. You may find you have experienced all of these and they trigger your writing. Or, only a few describe your reactions. Choose the ones that speak to you or resonate with you today. Please be aware many emotions may come up...consider having a friend to speak to afterward who understands the grief of losing a pet.
This holiday season…
Sadness:
I wanted…
I feel sad when…
I miss…
Anger:
I don’t understand…
I am angry that…
I feel frustrated with…
Fear:
I am afraid…
I am worried about….
I feel scared because…
Regret:
I didn’t want…
I regret…
I wish….
Comfort:
I need…
I want…
I have…
Love:
I love…
I appreciate…
I know…
I remember…
You may have had traditions with your pet that defined how you celebrated this time of year. After the death of your pet, the holiday season will not feel or look the same. Traditions and rituals may bring a tear or sadness rather than joy or peace. Reflect on what you need and/or want for this holiday season.
This holiday season, what I want and need are…
Tips for the Holiday Season:
- Recognize the holidays will be different this year.
- Do what makes you comfortable, not what well-meaning friends or others think you should do.
- Grief does not take a holiday even with all the colorful and cheerful distractions.
- Traditions can be very comforting. Consider a new tradition, in memory of your pet.
- Be prepared for a chain reaction of memories and emotions that may be triggered by a favorite toy or picture.
- Be kind to yourself. Grief affects you mentally, spiritually and physically. You may have less energy than usual.
- Allow friends and family to help when they offer.
- Take time for yourself and get plenty of rest.
- Set realistic goals for yourself, and reserve the right to change your mind at the last minute.